History 200

Hi Continuing from prior work done. Please see part 2 in rubic attached and feedback below.
You set up the topic quite well in your introduction. I do want you to clarify what you mean in your first few sentences though. You start out so broad there that it is unclear what exactly you are trying to say.
Also your thesis isn’t quite a thesis statement. A thesis statement isn’t just describing the intent of an essay it is a summation of your argument. Why is Title IX important? What challenges does it face? This is what you want to answer and make a clear and specific argument in your thesis.
You did add more than just the introduction here. From what you had it looks like  a nice start but there was an odd piece of phrasing. What did you mean by “the Philadelphia state”?
Beyond that I would also like for you to add a little more about the impact of Title IX in the last few decades prior to the changes under Trump.  This is a key part of the course section.

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